Friday, 23 May 2008

Hello Darlin'

Alright, Babe?

Any messages for me, Luv?


In a recent survey in the UK, these were voted as being the most annoying things that men call their female work colleagues - Darling, Babe and Luv.

I must admit that I would never dare to call my female colleagues any of these things, or anything like them! First, it is just plain rude, second I would probably get fired for sexual harassment and finally, if my wife found out I would find myself suddenly able to sing soprano!

So, guys - do you use names like this for your female colleagues?

Girls - would you find these or similar things annoying and/or offensive?

What is the worst thing you have ever been called at work?

In a previous job I was once called a.... well, let's say it began with C... In my current job things are much more civilised - the worst thing was that for my first 3 years here one of the lecturers kept calling me David, the name of my predecessor. I always wondered if he ever called his wife by the wrong name!


PS - having a long weekend - back on Wednesday - YAY ME!

24 comments:

mr zig said...

Um... if people recored the things we call each other in our office, or the things we say to each other most people would have a stroke! - But, it has gotten a lot more "normal" in the last while - but yeah, we are all kinda different here, and we are definitely NOT the typical office. :)

Chief Rock Chef said...

You have got me intrigued now! Maybe you should follow this up on your blog?

Is it a strange coincidence or are things more normal since Ali went on leave? I wonder...

amazingbrenda said...

I appreciate being called by my name. That's that, Specially by men. I would feel uncomfortable being called by something other than my name, unless is some kind of funny name that describes my goofiness.

Btw, love that beautiful tree, nice scenery.

Chief Rock Chef said...

AmazingBrenda - Imagine that - calling someone by their actual name! But do you mind if I just call you "Amazing"? :-)

Ali said...

Hey!!! You DO totally mean since I left things have gotten more normal! But yeah, I swear like a sailor, so it's not surprising.

I find I don't mind some of the cute names men call me, but I find it depends on who's saying it...

I used to get "doll face" from one of the guys in the office a lot, which I didn't mind. And my dad calls me babe, so I don't see that as negative either...

mr zig said...

oh oh -I've confused people! - It's actually been more "normal" since this other person left (about a year ago)(I didn't mean you Ali! - sorry!) - things things that went on back then, well they still blow my mind! hehe -

Chief Rock Chef said...

Ali - Hey, great to see you - missed you SO much! I can be happy this weekend now, knowing you are OK. Doll Face? Yes, I can see that. Not very English, though. Hugs!

Zig - Oh, sorry to stir it up for you! Hehehehehe!

Kiki said...

I am pretty sure I am in the minority in that I don't mind "pet" names like that, even in the workplace, I call my employees "sweetie" and "luv"...inappropriate?maybe. But we have great relationships and customers can tell that we like working with each other!!! As long as it is done in a non-condescending way...I think its okay, but then again, we aren't in an office setting so being casual is indicitive of our place of business.

Jahooni said...

i get called a BITCH a lot! ;)~
*snickers*

Sitting in Silence said...

I'm Ok with pet names or nick names...

I can pretty well dish them out as well. Only thing I find myself doing is giving them only to people I like....The others...well I have a huge problem even remembering who they are in the first place......

Although I once called a girl at work the wrong name for 12 months...she never even corrected me LMAO...

Princess of the Universe said...

I always hated it when my boss called me "dear". I always felt like he thought I was a child and didn't take my work seriously.
I used to hate it when boyfriends called me babe- for some reason it just annoyed me.

territerri said...

Let's see, I am mostly called by my name, sometimes "T.M." and most recently, while I was ill, "Tuberculosis Terri." (By a coworker who knows she can get away with it.) Another coworker with whom I am on friendly terms calls me "Teezy." But we are pretty professional and stick to our true names for the most part.

In high school, I worked in a bakery and my boss called me "Blonde Bombshell." I didn't know what that meant at the time and it was a few years later before it ocurred to me to be offended.

P.S. How come you get such a LONG long weekend? I only get a three day!

Chachi said...

It depends on the kind of relationship I have with that person. As you know from my blog we have a lot of nick names in my family. My fav name to be called (by my nephew only) is Suzybabe. He has called me that for years. I will often call someone I know fairly well Hon! or tootz!

Jen said...

I don't know. This is a tough one, Rock Chef. . . I agree that it depends on who does the name calling, but in general I prefer my name by everyone, 'cept the husband. It is work after all. And, if you allow from some people, but not others, well, that's opens a whole other can of worms.

Coming from the work employment background that I did, it wasn't allowed. I appreciated that. If someone did, I told them (politely) that wasn't my name.

The new endeavor I now have chosen also leads me to believe these types of names are not acceptable. I'm not a hardcore feminist; I love having my doors opened for me, but I just believe there is a time and a place for everything. Work is not a place for these nicknames or whatnot.

mindy said...

I think I'd smack a guy at work if he called me that. I had a male friend who called me "baby" for a while. I told him since we weren't having sex, he was NOT allowed to call me that. That stopped that nicely.

tz said...

I didn't work very long in the real world...but during my clinicals I did get called 'honey' a lot....sometimes I could tell it was just the patient being 'nice' and other times it was used in a condesending way....

so i guess i'd be okay if it was a patient and it was a term of affection, but co-workers and/or bosses, not so much.

have a great weekend away

jenelle said...

I was always the youngest in my work environment and the pet names, slang terms, and comments often left me frustrated. It took me years of hard work (and a feisty attitude) to get people to use my name and show some respect. Seeing as I was in charge of many of their projects, I think that respect is due. Even if I wasn't, that respect would still be do.

If your co-worker tells you to knock it off, please do so.

Alyssa said...

To be honest, I wouldn't mind being called darling, babe, or luv by my coworkers (not that they'd ever dare, in this day and age!).

There's this old guy who works at the Shell by my house and he calls me "sweetheart" all the time - I love it! I don't know why, but I usually really like girly-girl names, although if a parent called me this I would feel really uncomfortable - and maybe it would feel like a bit of a put-down or come-on. I guess it very much depends on the context.

I like when people use my name when they are saying something positive - HATE it when they use it to emphasize a negative. Like, "Those marks are due by the end of the day, Alyssa" as opposed to "Great job, Alyssa!"

Alyssa said...

... When I said I wouldn't like it if a parent called me babe or love, what I meant was a parent of one of my students. I like pet-names by my own parents. My Dad calls me babe, and I don't mind one bit!

Chief Rock Chef said...

Kiki - Yes, I think you are right - it is the way it is said, not just what is said.

Jahooni - Really? You must tell us more!

Sitting in Silence - 12 months? That is awful!

Princess - "Dear" is terrible! Babe varies with how it is said, I think. Can be cute, can be as bad as calling someone "ma bitch".

Terri - "Tuberculosis Terri" really takes the biscuit! fantastic!

Chachi - Suzybabe is really sweet.

Jen - Overall I think you are right, but as Kiki pointed out, in some situations, with the right team it is OK.

Mindy - Ooh, straight for the jugular! I think that is the problem isn't it - really familiar names can give the impression that things are going on that aren't.

tz - Yes, you hit the point too that it is the way it is said, not just what is said.

Jenelle - Being the youngest and woman must have made it really hard to get that respect - good for you.

Alyssa - We have a woman in the canteen here who calls me sweetheart - forgot about it until you said about your guy. The way she says it makes it seem OK. If she said it differently I think I would feel very uncomfortable.

kenady said...

I don't mind pet names and am infamous for having many for all of my co-workers. If I feel that it may be offensive to someone I am sure to use their name. And often times I ask if it's okay first. I don't being called pet names as long as it comes from the right person. And the last name I was called was "bitch" for stopping a shoplifter in the store.

Chief Rock Chef said...

Kenady - All very reasonable! I hope you were nice to the shop lifter and didn't use terms like "scum-bag" - they might have been offended and refused to "shop" with you again!

Ali Kat said...

I also don't mind pet names - the best is the southerners that call you sugar or sweetie! However, my neighbor used to call me Ali Kat all the time and I hated it (interesting that I obviously don't mind it anymore)... When my hubby and I were dating, he called me sweety-pie, which I loved, but then his family started it too, because his sister has the same name as me, and that I couldn't handle! So, one day, I walked into a family gathering and said, "Okay, I'm Alison, SIL is Ali, I will NOT be called sweety-pie until I'm 82 - it is reserved for hubby only!" I'm pretty straight forward and speak my mind, they took it seriously ;)

Jason Nark said...

I've never heard anyone use Luv in the states. I call my wife honey and she really gets pissed off. It's kind of cute.