Tuesday 27 October 2009

The Shopping Experience...

Today I visited a store called Aldi - "Spend a little, live a lot!" is the strap line. They are cheap-ish, everything is still in its boxes and it all seems to come from east European countries that no one has ever heard of.

Anyway, I was passing, needed something to nibble on so I went in.

It is a fairly big shop - half a dozen aisles and 5 checkouts.

There were about 3 customers and one worker in sight. The worker, a blond haired, blue eyed Nazi of a woman, was arranging some stuff in a basket near the middle of the shop.

I grabbed a couple of items and then headed towards the checkouts.

"CHECKOUT 5 PLEASE!"

The words came like bullets.

I dived behind the nearest box of beans and weeners. Poking my head over the top, I could see that she was still fussing with the basket of something or other.

On my belly I crawled to checkout 5, breathing easier when I reached the trench between it and checkout 4.

Eventually Eva (the name I decided to give to the woman) finished rustling the contents of the basket and strode slowly, menacingly, over to the checkout.

She seated herself.

Adjusted the seat.

Typed in her ID code.

Shrugged her shoulders.

Then, BAM, BAM, she scanned my items with lightning speed and precision.

"TWO POUNDS EIGHT PENCE PLEASE!"

I dived into the bottom of the trench, covering my head with my hands, waiting for the dust and rubble to settle.

I gingerly raised my hand over the top of the parapet, depositing the cash and grasping my rations.

I made a break for the door.

"THANK YOU!"

The last aimed just above my head, making me duck but not slowing my rush to escape.

"Live a lot", eh? Can't accuse them of false advertising, I guess!

6 comments:

Reggie Hunnicutt said...

We have Aldi's here. Not a fan either.

Rock Chef said...

Wreggie - they have gone GLOBAL?!

terri said...

We have Aldi's. Never been in one. A coworker didn't have nice things to say. And after reading your account, I think I'll stick to my nice, mild-mannered grocery store.

Anonymous said...

LOL!!! That was hilarious!! I've certainly dealt w/ those "types" in the past as well.

We also have Aldi's...I have "issues" with buying food from a store like that. I have several friends who swear by it but it's just not for me. Kinda reminds me of "the end of the world" with not having bags and stuff. LOL!!

agg79 said...

Nope. No sign of Aldi's down here. They haven't advanced this far south, yet, but we'll keep our guard up. In the meantime, we just have to stick with our giant chain mega stores that sell everything from milk to jewelry. One grocery store just opened up on the north side of town that is also selling furniture along with produce. I kinda miss the old mom & pop places.

Rock Chef said...

Terri - A very wise move.

Teresa - "End of the World" is a great description! I felt a bit like Arnie, except the phrase was "I won't be back!"

agg79 - All the big chains seem to be opening up to a range of stuff now, whether in their stores (a bag of sugar and a TV please) or online. My town still has a few small shops but they struggle to exist.