Friday...

I was planning another Friday Chillout guitar moment, but can't get to my guitar, so that will have to wait until next week now :-(

So what can I do instead?

Hm, not much really...

This is going to be a really dull post...

Yep...

As dull as a really dull person who is sitting in a windowless room illuminated by one of those energy-saving-eye-sight-destroying light bulbs...

Sigh...

Hey, here's a thought...

No, missed it, its gone now...

Sigh...

Ah, got it!

Yes!

This is it!

I want to write some songs and want slightly off the wall things to write about. Suggest a title/subject for a song in the comments section. I will try to write a song to go with the best one and do a vblog singing it.

Have a great weekend! I'm off home now, hoping I don't need a canoe - we have had so much rain today it is unbelievable...

Morning conversations...

What keeps a guy happy? This is the topic on the local radio channel as we drag outselves out of bed.

The guy on the radio is much like me - he thinks he only needs 3 things to make his world turn.

• Food. A hungry guy is never happy.
• Sex, or "Special Hugs" as he put it on the radio. Most women seem to be able to switch off this urge (or at least ignore it), but guys can't...
• TV. I guess he needs something to do in between the other 2 things.

Mrs RC asked if this is really true.

Of course it is, I tell her. Guys are very simple creatures, you know that. A full stomach, good sex and something to pass the rest of the time (guitars and toy soldiers in my case) is all we need for a happy life.

Jeez, says Mrs RC, I wish my life was as simple as that!

************************************

Mrs RC is standing in front of me in a new outfit. It really shows the results of her recent diet and exercise regime.

She looks great.

No, she looks fantastic.

OK, she looks so hot I want to throw her onto the kitchen table and...

"Does this look OK?"

"Yes, you look gorgeous."

"I'll look in the mirror again."

"Don't you believe me?"

"Nope!"

"Why not?"

"Because you said I was gorgeous when I weighed XX stone! You're mad!"

A New "Women's Lib"?

Back in the 1960s, women were busy burning their bras, breaking free from their physical constraint and the social constrait that they had come to represent.

Bras are, of course, back, but do seem to be much more comfortable than the monstrousities that were in fashion in the 1960s.

But women now seem to be enslaved my new objects - hair straighteners and curling tongs! Come on, ladies, admit it. How long do you spend each day using these implements to torture your hair into shape?

Some answers have already been discussed elsewhere. Shaving your head? A bit drastic! Works for some, but certainly not all!

I have a better option.

SMASH YOUR STRAIGHTENERS!

Free yourself from their tyrany!

Shake your hair loose and let nature decide where it goes! (A bit like those women who burnt their bras, I guess ;-) )

Do it! You know you want to!

Be careful what you joke about...

Ali's comment about my Lies post (i.e. I had joked about lusting after peanut butter and she said she had heard about that sort of thing for real) got me thinking.

Have you ever joked about something with totally the wrong people?

I have.

One time I had just joined a new band and we were chatting away about various gigs we had done. I told them about one where the band I was in had supported another band. The other band had been really difficult, refusing to let us set up on "their" stage. So we built our own out of wooden pallets in front of it! (Our drummer worked for a trucking company). We played and then left, leaving them with a ton of wood to get rid of! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

The guitarist looked at me.

"That was us!"

Ooopsie....

Come on, share one of yours!

The British Summer

I know - Brits always talk about the weather.

Why?

Well I think it is partly because we are rather dull and boring people.

Another factor is probably that it is so unpredictable!

I mean, if you live in Canada you will have a good idea of what the weather will be like in a particular month - January? Up to your ears in snow. August? Trying not to fry to death. Easy!

What is it like in England? Let's take Sunday...

Morning. Had to wear a coat while walking the dog, it was freezing cold.

Then it rained.

Then it got hot.

Then it got windy.

Then it rained again.

Then it was just humid, hot and windy at the same time, but looking like it would rain.

So I fired up the barbeque and the clouds parted, leaving it hot, sunny and very windy! (BTW the coals seemed to love the extra oxygen that the wind provided, soaring to amazing temperatures!)

By the evening dog walk it was starting to rain yet again, with rumbling thunder in the distance.

So be warned, if you are ever tempted to visit England...

Friday already?

This week has flown past!

Number One Son (doing work experience with me) has been fantastic, really showing off how good he is with programs like Excel and also how quickly he can pick up other programs. Yesterday he created a video fly-through along part of the Grand Canyon using our mapping software, complete with tilting view at the bends. So cool! He seems to have really enjoyed himself, and has risen amazingly to every challenge that I have thrown at him. Right now he is trying to automate another Excel task for me, while I do the photocopying. Isn't HE supposed to do that sort of rubbish job?

Has anyone else been trying to keep track of Swine Flu? Over here it isn't as much in the public eye as it should be, and has been spreading rapidly. The number of deaths here has suddenly jumped too, going from 17 to 29 in the last couple of days. Haven't see a figure this morning. The Health Service also suddenly announced their worse-case scenario - up to 65,000 deaths in the UK. This is a major change from the previous "nothing to really worry about" stance. Are they really only just waking up to how bad things could get? I don't know how things are in the US or Canada now, as it rarely seems to get a mention on CNN or FoxNews - except for the couple of billion that has now been allocated to dealing with it! Mrs RC smells a "keep quiet so they don't panic" situation...

Thoughts?

Lies!!!

Michele tagged me for this! In this meme, she challenged me to tell some lies. This is not something that comes easy to me, someone who once had the nick-name "Honest John"...

Here goes, I hope you enjoy it.


Pride: What is your biggest contribution to the world?
Impossible to say. My mere existence has improved the world no end, but I believe that it is the little things that count, such as this blog, which regularly brings a ray of sunshine into the otherwise dull and pointless lives of my readers.

Envy: What do your co-workers wish they had which is yours?
Where do I start? My dashing good looks, my brains, my talent for whatever I turn my hand to?

Gluttony: What did you eat last night?
A Chinese meal for 6, 3 cheese cakes and 12 bottles of beer.

Lust: What really lights your fire?
Peanut butter.

Anger: What is the last thing that really pissed you off?
We ran out of peanut butter.

Greed: Name something you keep from others.
I am actually richer than Bill Gates, but I don't tell anyone, not even my family. If I told them they would want me to spend some of it, and then where would I be, huh? And even worse, if the news got out I would have all these pesky poor people asking for donations so that their dogs could have operations, or their kids could go to Disney Land, not to mention the charities with their bleeding heart-begging for my cash! No, it's all mine!

Sloth: What’s the laziest thing you’ve ever done?
Being too lazy to chew my own food and forcing my children to chew it for me and then spit it into my mouth.


So there you go! Genuine RCBS!

Please feel free to join in!